Barry Varkel's new book Goy Vey

Divorce - Q: Why are Jewish divorces so expensive?

A: Because they are worth every cent.

 

The Foetus

There is a hell of a lot of controversy in the Jewish faith about when exactly life begins. 

In strict Jewish tradition, the foetus is not considered viable until it finishes medical school.

 

Mothers

Q: Why don't Jewish mothers drink?

A: Alcohol interferes with their suffering

 

School play

Young Sammy comes home from junior school and tells his mom Rivka he has a great part in the school play.

Rivka says: "What part is it, Sammy?"

Sammy says: "I play the part of the Jewish husband".

Rivka says angrily: "Go back to those idiots, and tell them you want a speaking part"

 

Jewish holidays

This is a short summary of nearly every Jewish holiday - "they tried to kill us. We beat them. Let's eat and drink - oy vey!"

 

Dogs

Q: What is the difference between a Pit Bull and a Jewish mother?

A: Eventually the Pit Bull lets go.

 

Contributed by:
Barry Varkel, an attorney of the High Court of South Africa and Solicitor of the Supreme Court of England and Wales.
Author of Nigiri Law
 

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