Bob goes to sleep next to his wife and wakes up a little surprised in front of St. Peter.
“You died in your sleep, Bob,” says St. Peter.
“No! I’m too young! Send me back!”
“I can only send you back as a dog or a hen.”
Bob figures a dog’s life is too much work. A hen just walks around a farm all day. “A hen.”
Poof. Bob is a hen in a chicken yard. Right away, he feels like his ass is going to explode.
A rooster walks over. “You must be the new hen. How’s it going?”
“Okay, but I feel like my ass is about to blow.”
“Oh, you just need to lay an egg. Cluck twice and push as hard as you can.”
Bob clucks twice and pushes. Plop. An egg.
“Wow, that felt great!” He clucks again and pushes. Another egg.
He clucks a third time, and he hears his wife scream:
“Robert! For F..K sake, wake up! You’re shitting in the bed!”
