Wife says no to fishing weekend with the boys

John had always looked forward to his annual fishing trip with his buddies. It was a sacred tradition—a time for cold beers, campfire stories, and, of course, trying to outfish each other. For the past four years, they had ventured to the same remote lakeside spot where the fish were plenty and the world was quiet. But this year, his wife put her foot down. “No fishing trip this year,” she declared, citing a long list of neglected household chores that supposedly needed his immediate attention. His friends were dismayed; without John, it just wouldn’t be the same.

Two days later, John’s friends trudged into the familiar campsite. What they didn’t expect was to see smoke curling up from a well-tended fire, John lounging in a camp chair with a satisfied smirk on his face, sipping a cold beer.

“John! How on earth did you manage to get your free pass?” one friend exclaimed, dropping his gear in astonishment.

“Well, fellas, it was looking pretty bleak, I won’t lie. I was resigned to my fate, sitting in my recliner, when suddenly my wife comes over, covers my eyes with her hands, and whispers, ‘Guess who?’ I played along, ‘Hmmm, the warden granting me a pardon?’ She just laughed and guided me to stand up.”

He continued, “When she removed her hands, there she was—in fancy lingerie from Victoria’s Secret, no less. The bedroom was all done up, candles flickering and rose petals everywhere. Seems she’d been reading ‘Fifty Shades of Grey’, because next thing I know, out come the ropes and handcuffs. She hands them to me, bites her lip, and says, ‘Tonight, you can do whatever you want.’”

His friends leaned in, half confused, half intrigued.

John grinned broadly, “So, I tied her up, cuffed her to the bed, and here I am!”